As long as I can be with You, I know I'll be OK.
So it shouldn't matter where you send me or what you do with my life. As long as I can fellowship with You, then I can adapt and accept and be useful to You...listening; sensitive to Your Spirit; obeying in the little details; yielding my heart and mind and will to Your Voice.
Even if my circumstances or the people around me are not listening or yielded and sensitive to You, I still can be. Even in spite of my fears or reservations or personal hangups - you will deal with me, helping me to see them and face them and change them.
Lord, I can see that you are teaching and helping and challenging me to create this new habit, this new way of being...of tuning in to You, being sensitive to Your Voice, yielding my will to what You bring into each day; taking steps of obedience.
I know that I am just taking baby steps (as shameful as that is at this point in my life!) and my biggest fear is that I will disappoint You. That I won't be brave and bold and courageous and obedient enough to REALLY be useful to You!
But let's not go there yet. For now, the baby steps.
Jesus, I love you. In my limited, weak, distorted, failing, self-centered, human way - but I love you and I want my life to be useful to You. I know that in order to be really useful to You, I need to be more humble, more sacrificial, more generous (of spirit, self, time, resources), more sensitive to Your Voice and promptings, more gracious, more forgiving - less concerned about my own self-interests, less prideful, have less fear of man, have less opinions about what I will or won't do.
What if what I least want to do is what you most want me to do?
And the obedience part does scare me, I admit it. As long as it's easy things then I feel like I can handle it with Your help. But, I know that the small things lead to bigger things down the road and that makes me feel anxious. Anxious that I will fail and disappoint.
But again. Let's take it one step at a time - baby steps. First today. And then tomorrow. Then the next day.
Breath deep. Focus on YOU! Gaze at Your Face, into Your Heart. Give you the praise and worship you deserve - even while my world spins around me. Walk with You. In Your Presence. In Your Peace. In Your Truth. In Your Grace and Love. In fellowship and communion with You.
Slow down my heart. Slow down my mind. Slow down my body.
Just be with You. As long as I can be with You, I know I'll be OK.
