Sunday, September 22, 2013

Open Casting Call

The devil is writer, director and producer and he wants to cast YOU in the leading role!

Are you up for the part?

It's not hard.  All you have to do is just act according to your flesh.  And the more practice you get, the easier it is and the better you get at playing the part like a pro!

There are some things you'll need to practice to really perfect the art:

gossip, criticism, judging, indifference, dirty-looks, unforgiveness, backstabbing, causing division, self-pity, jealousy, suspicion, accusations, twisting truths, exaggeration, selfishness, mistrust... just to name a few.

And you have to learn to let yourself get carried away by your emotions and thoughts and imaginations.

Sometimes the role calls for subtlety - where your poison is barely noticeable to the human eye.  Other times it must come pouring out of you, full of emotion and spewing for everyone to see.

But don't worry, you'll get the hang of it because he'll give you lots of opportunities to rehearse and perfect your craft!

He is always producing new shows so you'll have plenty of work to choose from.  When you are hired by him, you'll never lack a part to play.  He's a good boss that way - very generous with his job opportunities.

Oh, and lots of people love to watch his shows, so you'll have a great audience to play for!  Some are critics, of course, and they will analyze your performance and discern how genuine your art is.  But most are just fans who will cheer you on!

There is a lot of job flexibility too!  He has shows going simultaneously all over the world so you can literally go wherever you want and be assured you'll find work!

The only bad part really is that the membership fees to his actors guild are kind of high.  You have to give up your soul.  That can be pretty stressful and hazardous to your health.  Oh, and the longer you pay your dues, the harder it is to get out of your contract.  But other than that it sounds like a great deal!

So what do you think?

Do you want the job?